Sometimes as a woman, you may feel like something is wrong with you. One day your body is roaring with desire and you can’t keep your hands off of your man, but the next day, the very sound of his voice may make you want to strangle him, or at least yell at him. This can cause a lot of tension in your relationship. Here are some tips to help you understand why you could be struggling with your libido, along with seven strategies to help you handle your wild monthly hormonal ride.
Manage Your Monthly Roller Coaster Ride for a Better Relationship
Here are the top seven ways to deal effectively with those monthly changes:
1. Understand the Reasons.
As a woman, you are quite often at the mercy of your unpredictable and confusing hormonal fluctuations. However, you can take control of your changing body to successfully track your moods and bodily urges. If you know how to keep track and adjust your schedule and monthly plans to prepare yourself, you can plan your special date nights on the days you will most likely be more open to a sexual encounter.
Here are some reasons why learning to track your libido roller coaster is important:
- Having an active and healthy sex life is vital not only to your own life and the life of your relationship, but it will also help your partner’s health, as well.
- Being sexually active with your partner also allows him to feel loved, since most men directly link sex with the emotion of love.
- Tracking your libido will lead to more times when you and your partner are in sync and can both take advantage of your more amorous days.
2. Know Your Body.
Getting a grip on the ups and downs of your sexual drive means learning your own body’s cycle. Knowing when your menstruation begins and the number of days in your monthly cycle will help you target the specific days you will have higher amounts of sexually-powerful hormones. The typical period cycle is considered to be 28 days. This goes from the beginning of one period until the beginning of the next period.
Here are some basics about your monthly cycle, as well as some information that can help you better understand your body:
- Since 28 days is the average number of days for a menstrual period, that means you can’t always rely on that number.
- You must track your own cycle for a few months to determine if your period is standard and happens on a regular basis, or if your period is atypical.
- Once you know the days in your monthly cycle, you can start to track your hormonal fluctuations.
- Sticking with the 28-day cycle puts your ovulation day at day number 14 of your cycle. When a woman is ovulating, that is when most women experience a dramatic spike in sexual desire because your body is urging you to copulate.
- This leaves you with the dreaded time frame of PMS, or premenstrual syndrome. This nightmare time frame of mix emotions, crazy feelings and bodily changes is typically and understandably a time frame when you will not feel any sexual desire.
- Then there is the actual time of your period. Women can have periods from three days, all the way up to 10 days depending on their own bodies and hormones. Each woman is different, so you must track your own cycle to get an idea of how many days you have. Some women have increased sexual urges, even during menstruation
3. Learn About Tracking.
Now that you can see the different steps of your monthly cycle and know a little more about what time frame your hormones are expected to pop up, you must learn to track them yourself. There are many ways that you can track your own cycle. Each one is a method that you must absolutely feel comfortable will to keep up with the process.
Tracking your cycle to help you be familiar with when your libido will be higher. Here are some common ways to do this:
- The oldest and most common way to track your cycle is by marking your calendar This is a hard copy of your cycle that you keep at home, office, or in your purse. A calendar is a good idea for people who like to see things in writing and like writing.
- There is another form of calendar tracking by using the app available on most smartphones, computers and tablets. This is a good option for you if you are constantly on the go, but always have a phone or other device at hand. With new features, such as mobile syncing, you can easily enter information on your computer at work and then later check it on your computer at home or your phone on the go.
- You can also leave the hard work for someone else. With a variety of apps that you can download to any mobile device you can easily track your cycle by merely knowing your cycle and entering the data. However, if you are just learning to track yourself, you can get apps that help you by just entering when your period starts and stops each month. Then you can let it you figure the rest of the days.
- There is a more scientific and invasive way to track your cycle that is supposed to be a lot more accurate than just knowing when your period starts and stops. This is referred to as cervix tracking. You have to learn how to identify the height of your cervix at certain times in your cycle. It also required knowing about your cervical mucus. This is a good option if you prefer to be more natural and in tune with your body when tracking your monthly cycles.
4. Plan Your Life Around Your Cycle.
How will all this help you to identify when you will be more likely to be physically and emotionally in the mood for sex? When you are ovulating, your body will be raging with estrogen and testosterone. These hormones come in full force during ovulation to encourage you to get busy in the bedroom. This is because your body is just like other mammals. It wants you to reproduce whenever you are ovulating.
When you know what time of the month your ovulation is, you can plan to have a date night with your significant other. On the other hand, during the time when you are experiencing all the negative hormones from your premenstrual syndrome, you will want to avoid date nights or encouraging your lover to make advances.
This will lead to more frequent romps in the sack and less stress between you two. When you can let your guy know that certain days will be best to avoid making unwanted advances a head of time you may avoid arguments or miscommunication and hurt feelings.
5. Talk About Your Period and Sex.
Another conversation that you may want to have with your man is how both of you feel about period sex. While it is still taboo and frowned upon in certain religious groups and cultures, it is not a bad thing. Science has even said that orgasms during menstruation can help you alleviate cramping caused by your period. There are also many women who have reported that they have increased sexual urges during their periods.
While it can be messy. you can always work out a way to be intimate. Regardless of how you or your partner feel about having period sex, it is something that you two should come to an agreement about between yourselves.
6. Understand the Effects of Birth Control Pills.
If you are one of the many of women who are using birth control pills, it may be a lot more difficult for you. Birth control has been known to cause you to lose sexual interest altogether. It is also known to make you stop having a period, which would make tracking difficult. Another unfortunate issue you may experience with birth control is that since some of them block ovulation, will you still experience the increase in hormones when you should be ovulating.
Here are some tips and information that can help you with your libido on birth control:
- It is true that hormonal birth control options will mess with your hormones. Which is no big surprise since they are pumping extra hormones into your body.
- This can mean either a lower or higher sex drive for you just depending on how your body reacts to your birth control method.
- There is actually no solid information on whether birth control will lower or raise your libido. This is because not all women are alike. While some women report lower or higher sex drives others report they saw no difference.
- Hormonal birth control options can mess with your testosterone levels. This is because they prevent you from ovulating and may also bind the releasing of testosterone during your normal ovulation days.
- You may also not experience those hormonal spikes during your ovulation that make you feel more sexual.
- Birth control is also linked to the inability to produce your natural vagina secretions. That will make it hard for you to become aroused, because becoming wet is so difficult.
- Don’t automatically blame your birth control, because there is no one thing that affects a woman’s sex drive. With so many factors that can make or break your sexual urges, you can’t rest blame on one thing only.
- If you are concerned that your birth control is causing relationship and low libido issues, you can always ask your doctor about hormone-free birth control options.
- You should also check out other factors that may be causing problems with your libido.
- Something that you may need to consult your partner about is prepping for the deed. If you find yourself not in the mood, you may have to encourage you man to help get you in the mood with foreplay.
- If dryness is an issue, you can always consider using lubrication to help you out during sexual encounters.
7. Determine Other Libido Crushers in Your Life.
However, what if birth control is not the only problem with your libido? What other things could there be causing you extra issues with finding the sexual desire to be intimate? There are a number of other things that can inhibit your libido and cause your sexual relationship problems.
Other factors you can look for when you have problems with a lower libido:
- Take time to evaluate your stress level. If you have an excessively stressful life or a sudden onslaught of stress, that could you make your libido drop fast.
- If you suffer or think you suffer from depression, this is another culprit in lowering a woman’s sex drive. If you are unsure if you are suffering from depression, you should consult your doctor for diagnosis and management help.
- Prescription medications can also cause your sexual desire to fall below acceptable levels. If you are unsure if any of the pills you are taking may be affecting your sex drive, you should contact your doctor. Anti-depressants and pills for hypertension have been linked to lower libido.
- Certain foods can even affect your sex drive in a negative manner. Fast foods from the local drive through, soy and mint have all been linked to lowering your sex drives.
- Your sleeping habits can also cause you to have a lower sexual drive, as well. If you are not getting enough sleep, you can easily see a dip in your libido.
- Another culprit is not drinking enough water. Dehydration can lower libido, because it can cause headaches and vaginal dryness.
- Finally, thinking too much about your sexual desire can make you less inclined to become aroused. When you tend to over-think things, you can cause yourself extra stress and make it harder to become interested in sex. Relax and focus on cuddling and kissing.
As a woman, you have a lot of things to deal with, such as childbirth, hormones, birth control and your monthly cycle. That is why it is best for you to know your body and learn to catch any problems before they become major issues. This includes understanding the changes in your libido. When you know that your sex drive has changed, you can help yourself prevent other health issues by trying to locate your triggers and correct them.
In addition, regular sex has proven health benefits, such as helping your immune system, improving your bladder control, and lowering your blood pressure, just to name a few. Regardless of what your reasons are, learning about your libido can be vital to your life.